Shipping & Returns
Quietly to your door, supported for years.
Every Thelemonclitsucker order ships in unbranded packaging from our warehouse. Domestic orders are free. Returns are easy. The two-year warranty is real.
Shipping at a glance
Standard US transit
On all US orders
Return window
Warranty included
How shipping works
Discreet packaging
Orders ship in plain corrugate with a generic return address. The packing slip lists the brand only as 'Thelemonclitsucker.' Nothing on the outside identifies the contents.
Domestic delivery
Free standard shipping on every US order. UPS or USPS, 2–4 business days. Expedited options at checkout (1–2 business days). Tracking emails go out the moment the label is generated.
International
We ship to Canada, the UK, Australia, and the EU. Duties and import VAT are collected at checkout — no surprise fees on delivery. Transit is 5–10 business days.
Hold orders
Need to delay shipping? Email [email protected] within four hours of placing the order and we can hold it up to 30 days.
Returns & warranty
Two-year warranty
Every device carries a two-year warranty against motor failure, battery degradation, and silicone separation. We replace or repair, free of shipping charges, on the first claim.
Hygiene note
We accept returns even on used products — your refund is processed regardless. Returned units are not refurbished or resold. They're recycled responsibly through our materials partner.
Something arrived broken or wrong? Email [email protected] with a photo and your order number. We'll have a replacement on its way the same business day, in most cases.